I recently stumbled upon a TEDx talk by Kathleen Taylor who is encouraging us to rethink the bucket list. Taylor is a licensed mental health counselor who has worked in the nonprofit healthcare and social services sector for over 20 years. In her TEDx talk she shares her experience providing counsel to people who are dying.
Now, you might ask yourself what do dying people and bucket lists have to do with communicating your message? A lot. Read on to find out:
As a professional listener of stories people tell on their dead beds, Kathleen Taylor noticed a common thread: “People at the end of their lives are incapable of bullshit.” And Taylor knows why: “All the daily, worldly distractions that tempt us away from being honest with ourselves, fall off the map when you’re facing death.”
The distractions, according to Taylor, are different for everyone: being right, being important, being busy, being guilty, or being self-conscious.
One thing is clear though: People at the end of their lives are distilled, crystallized, and pure versions of who they are. Because there’s no time or strength left to be otherwise.
What if we could get to that unadulterated version of who we are NOW?
Wouldn’t that completely change how we communicate in our personal life and in business?
Exercise: Think about what distracts you throughout the day. And focus on emotional distractions, not so much actual things.
Write down what emotions or feelings come up during the day. Are you feeling misunderstood? Guilty? Self-conscious? Angry? Disappointed?
Take each and every emotion on your list and ask yourself: Why am I feeling that way? What triggered this emotion? How do I feel about having this emotion? Am I truly connected to how I feel or am I reacting out of habit?
This exercise will help you become more connected to your feelings and help you figure out how to better deal with recurring emotional distractions. It’s a first step to how you truly want to feel and be.
Kathleen Taylor tells us about the transformative power of this kind of authenticity.
Click to tweet this: As people step into their authentic selves, they become more courageous. No more bullshit, remember?! Just pure you.
As we’re often so focused on doing the right thing when it comes to communicating our message, I want to encourage you to shift your focus to “being”. Taylor suggests trying this: Think about how you would spend your last day on earth? But instead of doing any of the things on your bucket list, take a hint from the people who are actually spending their last day.
Do some introspection.
Remember: Doing flows out of who you are. If you want to communicate from a place of true authenticity, spend time answering this question: Who am I being with my life?
Those who know the answer to that question are able to express their uniqueness in the world. Let your message be inspired by who you are.
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